Today, Tuesday, November 24, 2009 there is a special 24-hour fundraising event. If you have a buck or ten you can toss into the coffer to help raise money for these wonderful programs, I'd be especially grateful. And if you do it within the 24-hour period via my sponsorship page (https://www.gifttool.com/athon/SponsorAParticipant?ID=1891&AID=777&PID=109076) I'll write you in as a character in my current novel, iRON-ic Suicides, which is a dark comedy (and yes, I'll be nice and not transform you into a writing pin-cushion). To watch my progress and learn more about this year's novel, check out my NaNo page at: http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/user/21182.

Next up: A site and blog revamp! Look for it soon (but not before the end of NaNoWriMo, foo'!)

Where's your flag? Is it out today? Have you thought about the thousands of Americans who died just eight years ago, today? The thousands more who've died, been maimed, are struggling as they fight in a war for justice and to preserve your freedom? Those left behind? Those who work tirelessly on home soil to protect and preserve our freedom? Don't let the memories slip away. Don't forget to thank those who have worked to give you your freedom. Don't. Forget.

A few years ago the kidlets and I took part in a special tribute to the 2,996 victims of September 11, 2001. Author D. C. Roe had spearheaded, Never Forget. He vowed to never forget the 2,996 lives that had been taken from this planet that fateful day, their contributions and the families and loved ones they left behind. The boys and I were given five names to research, learn about and join D. C. Roe in vowing to remember them.

We are thinking of Ernest Alikako, Francis J. Nazario, Frederick Kuo Jr., Jimmy Audiffred and Juan Salas who were victims of 9-11. We will be thinking of their families. Of their contributions to this world, to our country before their untimely demise. We will be lifting them up, their families up. We challenge you to do the same. For more information about the project, to participate or read the tributes other bloggers have put together to never forget the other 2,991 victims, visit Roe's new website at: http://project2996.wordpress.com/

It is not intended to depreciate the situation. As the family attempts to return to some semblance of normalcy, so shall the blog posts here. And I felt it was a more appropriate blog, too.

Keeping the faith

Posted at approximately 10:45pm PT

Sorry I didn't update earlier after I spoke with the Dr., But I had a much needed meltdown instead. When I spoke with the doc he told me that he would remove the ventriculostomy today and that Sean would get orthopedic surgery sometime this week. Also they will be giving Sean a tracheotomy because he still needs the ventilator and it has been down his throat to long.

I asked the Dr. what he thought of the fact that Sean opens his eyes and moves but doesn't respond to commands. He basically told me that it is way to early to tell. Sean could be blind or have no ability to speak. He said that some people never progress beyond where Sean is now and some people come all the way back. He said that in the CT it looks like the parts of the brain that are affected have to do with judgement, memory and personality. All in all He seemed pretty positive about Sean's prognosis, without offering promises. He said that most people would not have survived so that's saying a lot.

I asked him how long until we get an idea where Sean is at and he told me that it will be many months before we know anything. That made me cry.

To be honest, I felt like he punched me in the gut. At the beginning of this we thought that we would have Sean home and healing in a month. recently we had resolved ourselves to the fact that it might take two months. Never ever did we think that this would go on for many months. I have been so tired and depleted the last few days. I honestly thought at that moment, I can't do this. I felt helpless. So I prayed then I went home to Vince and cried my eyes out.

Then Vince and I talked about the next leg of this marathon and how we can best handle it. We have decided that we will not do night shifts anymore. If Sean needs us the hospital will call us. We are going to visit after 8 then go home, spend the evening and go to bed together. We are still going to spend our days at the hospital (hey one step at a time). We also talked about Vince returning to work soon. Probably next week.

We will re-evaluate then, one day at a time. I also called a couple who went through a very similar experience as ours with their daughter. We are going to get together with them this week and I think that will be very helpful.

When we were getting ready to leave the house one of Sean's good friends called. We had such a nice talk. This is a young man who has been through an extremely painful life experience and I have always greatly admired him and his amazing family. He gave me some very sound advice, and we are going to take it.

Remember how I have talked about how God keeps putting the right person at the right place at the right time? Well He did it again today in the people I spoke with on the phone, my go to girls who came to my rescue today, Kiersten's friends who were with her today and Vince's running buddies who he went to run with today.

Someone told me today that we are helpless in this and that is exactly why we need to lean on and trust God. Well she is so right and when we were so low today God met us there and gave us new hope and strength. God truly never ceases to amaze me!

Sooo what you want to know about is how did Sean's day go. Weelllll, he got the vent out and did very well. He has been awake most of the day and although he doesn't respond to commands, he is so expressive. I know that he understands much of what is going on. It's just going to take awhile for his brain to start putting things together, like command=response.

God has seen him thus far and He wont leave him now. What you could specifically pray for this week is that Sean's tracheotomy and orthopedic surgery go smoothly (we don't know what day those will be yet, I will keep you posted). Pray that Sean's ICP, heart rate and Bp [blood pressure] stay low. Also please pray for God to comfort Sean's mind, sometimes he looks so scared and stressed.

Thank you for listening to me ramble. I work out a lot of my worry on these pages. Mainly thank you for your love, support and unending prayers. Keep the faith!

Love,
Terri, Vince, Sean & Kiersten

Three weeks

Posted at approximately 7:00 AM PT

Well we are on day 21 today and Sean continues to improve. I'm sitting by his bedside as he rests. We are listening to Lorena McKennit. During the night his nurse was able to lower his meds more. He is nearly off of the versed. Everyone seems to think that the doctor will want to remove his ventriculostomy today. If that happens it will be after 3pm because it has to be 12 hours after his last dose of anti-coagulant. I will know more after [the doctor] comes in. I'll keep you posted. Sean is opening his eyes a little more and he shows emotion in his expressions but he is still not responding to commands. I think that is probably a combo of drugs and Sean being obstinate.

We are starting to feel a little worn out. We are rejoicing with the positive changes but we are tired. This journey that we are on is an arduous one. If anything we are spending more time here then before because as Sean becomes more alert we want him to see a familiar face and hear a familiar voice. Please pray for strength and stamina for us as we enter the next leg of this race. Don't get me wrong, I haven't lost my gratitude for all that God is doing for Sean and how he has sustained us thus far. I'm just keeping it real folks. Personally, I need my go to girls. You know who you are (I've told you) and I need you right now to prop me up a little. I know I can count on you ladies because you are all amazing in your strength and comfort.

Well that's it for now, I will post a little more after the Dr. comes in.
Have a blessed day beautiful people. Keep believing, keep praying.

Love,
Terri, Vince, Sean & Kiersten

Posted approximately 10:00 pm PT

Well, Sean had another good day today. His ICP's stayed fairly low...around 14-20. He is very responsive with his eyes and eyebrows, its actually hilarious. You can tell when he isn't enjoying a procedure, or when its too loud in the room because he glares and puts his angry face on. Everyday we get to see more and more of Sean, and its amazing.

As for now, we are just hoping for a calm night, and for more of Sean's awesome personality tomorrow. My mom and dad are very thankful for all your support, but for now my mom is getting some much need sleep, and my dad is chillin' with my bro. We will update you ASAP tomorrow. Have a great night, and thank you.

Love,
The [family]

As I write this I am in Sean's room and we are listening to Ray La Montagne and all is well. I have been working on an update for the last two hours with intermittent interruptions when his nurse has to do things with him. I wrote this long update about Sean from birth until now and how wonderful he is. When I went to post I lost my Internet connection and lost the post! Oh well he probably wouldn't have liked for me to gush on about him. So suffice it to say I think that Sean is an amazing guy and I am very proud of him. He is cruising along today. Slowly but surely making his way back to us.

Have a wonderful day and keep up the prayers because Sean is a miracle. God is listening and He is present.

Love,
Terri, Vince, Sean & Kiersten

A steady day

Posted at approximately 9:00 pm PT

Today I realized that I am so tired I can't hardly stand it. So I stayed at the hospital until 7 and came home for the night. Vince is back there now and I will return at 6. I am catching up on an episode of Survivor and typing this then I am off to bed. I have not spent 8 hours in a bed since before Sean's accident. Tonight, even if I don't sleep through the night I will be in my bed for 8 hours.

Enough about me. Sean had another steady day. They weren't able to lower the dose on anything. His nurse actually had to increase at one point because his BP went up and wouldn't come down, but eventually everything mellowed out and she was able to lower it again. He opens his eyes so wide now. It is hard to tell if he is doing anything on command yet but everyone agrees that he is doing good. One more thing, they took out his swan catheter today and they got rid of his Bis monitor ( a strip across his forehead, like a mini eeg).

It was a good day for Sean and a few other patients in The NTSICU today. Three patients were moved to another floor (good news). Unfortunately it was a bad day for a couple of other patients and their families were really suffering today. I can't put names to protect their privacy but please say a prayer for the patients in NTSICU and their families.

Time for mimi. Goodnight. I hope you all worked on your assignment today and enjoyed it. Keep praying. God likes your voices and He loves your heartfelt prayers.

Love,
Terri, Vince, Sean, & Kiersten

Quiet time

Posted at approximately 8:45 am PT

I am sitting in the waiting room waiting. I want to catch the doctor today and see how he feels about Sean's progress so I wait. I am the only one in here this morning so I am enjoying the peace and solitude for a little while. I was hanging out with Sean from 6-7 and he just keeps improving. He is opening his eyes all the way now. We can't get him to follow directions as to where to look. He mainly looks off to one side but he looks straight sometimes. He is still on a lot of meds. He is moving his left hand more as well as his left leg and foot. Last night they were able to decrease the versed quite a bit. They also reduced the amount of csf (cerebral spinal fluid) that is coming out of his ventriculostomy. He is doing great! As always I can't say enough about [the hospital's] NTSICU nurses. They truly amaze me with their skills and compassion.

As for the rest of [our family]. We are doing well. We're tired and we want Sean better now but we're holding our own with God's help and your support. Yesterday Vince and I were talking about how much we love and appreciate our little family and I told him through tears that I have never appreciated us as much as I do now. I look at some of the crap that used to bother me and it's just that, crap. I know that when Sean is all better we will come out of our cocoon and life will return with all it's stuff and we wont always see things as we do now. But I sincerely hope that we can retain some of the hard earned lessons that we are learning now.

Last night Kiersten was talking about how much she misses her brother and she just wants to hear his voice. And we starting talking about how much we all laugh together and how important that is to our family. We realized that although we have had some moments of levity, for the most part we haven't had the laughter we are used to. We need Sean to bring us the laughter and you know what? He's coming back to us. I know that God will return him to us whole again because God has given me a peace about this. I honestly believe that when Sean is home and we are all laughing with each other that we will not take that beautiful sound for granted again.

BREAKING NEWS....... [The neurosurgeon] just came in to talk to me and he said, "We're winning". That's huge out of a neurosurgeon's mouth! He told me all the things I said above and he said that the fact that Sean is not following directions is due to the meds, everything looks good. Can I get a hallelujah!

Well I am going to go see my boy again before I run home for a shower (that's if I can force myself to leave for an hour). I do have an easy assignment for you today. Laugh with your family or the people that you are close to. Don't try to imagine yourself in our situation, it's to painful, but try, really try to drink it all in. Focus on those people and why you love them so very very much. Try with all your might not to take one moment of this day with those people for granted. And thank God, yes thank God with all or your heart and soul for blessing you with them.

Thanks for the prayers and support. Keep it up prayer warriors, you are amazing . We love you and we thank God for blessing us with all of you.

Love,
Terri, Vince, Sean, & Kiersten

The most beautiful blue eyes we've ever seen

Posted at approximately 7:00 pm PT

Sean is opening his eyes. Mainly just a little bit maybe 1/4 open, but a few times today he opened them almost all the way and once he made eye contact with me. It may have been because I was standing in his line of vision because he seems to be looking only one way. Whatever it was we saw our Sean's eyes for the first time in 17 days and they were the most beautiful blue eyes we have ever seen. He is also moving his left hand some. Today I was clipping his finger nails and he squeezed my hand ever so slightly. He is still completely off of the pentabarb and his nurse was able to lower his vercid very slightly. He is still in critical condition and by no means out of the woods yet. We still haven't heard the magical words, "He's going to live", but he has come a heck of a long way and there is absolutely no reason to believe that God won't see him the full distance.

I'm sorry I didn't update earlier but I think after reading this you understand why. I couldn't stay away from him. Today I left him with Vince a few times to run errands but for the most part I couldn't stop looking at him! Hallelujah! God is great! If the coming days continue this way I might find that I can only update once a day so I want you all to know that no news is good news. If something is wrong Sue or I will put up a quick update to let you all know what you can specifically pray about. Even in the good days though, please keep Sean in your prayers. We appreciate your prayers and support so much and please know that I will try very hard to update twice a day if I can. I know you all love him and are anxious for news.

I must run now. We are back to the hospital. Goodnight. Rejoice in Lord with us tonight!

Love,
Mr. blue eyes and family