fiction « Journals of Journeys

5Sep/09Off

Exiled Excerpt: Young Adult Work In Progress

While at the Pacific Northwest Writing Association's annual conference in Seattle this past July and waiting for my appointment with the incredible Erin Brown, a book doctor (more on her in a moment ) I chatted with a couple fellow writers. One was a young woman who writes science fiction/fantasy and the other was a slightly older guy whom I believe said he writes suspense. He asked how many works in progress (WIP) we had going. She answered two. I did the like (although in reality, I toy with about three). He said he could only do one at a time. We figured that was just because women, without stereotyping too much here, are probably better at multi-tasking.

A fellow writer, whom I met during the conference (long story, but the short of it is, she lives in the Seattle area, had attended the national romance writers conference, so wasn't attending the PNWA con), said it's best to stick to one novel and keep notes for other novel ideas. I'm not so sure I agree with that, but have been trying to take her advice. I find that if I get stuck on one novel, I can shift gears and go on to another WIP, work on that until I get stuck, shift again - lather, rinse, repeat. Since she made the suggestion, I'm trying to stick to just one. So far, it's been going good.

Until mid-morning yesterday.

I got stuck so bad I was reaching for my cell to call AAA and ask for a tow. So I flipped over to the Young Adult (YA) WIP. Thank goodness, too. I got a problem resolved in there (we'll get to that in a moment) and was able to return to the suspense-thriller I was stuck on. Progress once again!

The YA WIP I'd sent to Erin back in March had been in the second round of revisions, . Since then I had made a complete rewrite, did some more revisions, and set it aside. So when I was preparing to meet with Erin the night before our appointment, I pulled up the WIP and skimmed it. It was absolutely dreadful! I was mortified to have to go in and face this woman and the very moment she smiled up at me and shook my hand, I burbled out my apology. She was surprised because she said that my writing was strong, I had some very nice character descriptions, a great idea and she just had a few suggestions to pass along.

She lied.

She had a ton of great suggestions, ones that immediately were put to use. I did spend some time going back and taking her suggestions to heart, reworked the piece. But as I mentioned before, I got stuck.

After today's near-death-experience with the suspense-thriller WIP, I dusted off the YA WIP and found out why I was hitting the wall in that one. I simply had to cut a scene.

So... along with the high recommendation to hire Erin Brown, I present to you the exiled excerpt from my YA WIP:

Tommy reached his hand out from the sweatshirt's sleeves, fingers opening like a crab's claws. He brushed a lock of Dani's hair away from her eyes. She resisted the urge to pull back from having her personal space violated.

Had she given him the wrong signals?

His hand hovered there and then his eyes closed, his long, curled lashes resting on his cheeks. It was all she could do to keep from bursting out in laughter. She was picturing the flour that had coated those lashes clear back when they were still in third grade after a science project went wonky.

She pulled her head back. His lips were moving in her direction. "Tommy!"

His eyes flashed at her. "What?" His cheeks practically glowed bright red.

She laughed. "You weren't going to kiss me, were you?"

"No," he said at a decibel just above silent. Stepping back, he put his hands on his bike's handlebars.

"Good, because that would be weird," Dani told him as she unwound the chain from under her bike's seat.

"Why's that?"

She shrugged and kneeled down to thread the chain through the back tire's spokes. "'Cause you're more like a brother, I guess. I mean, come on, Tommy. I've known you since we were in diapers!"

He laughed too, but that's when it dawned on her that maybe he had been intending on kissing her. That thought made her stomach gurgle. It also made her sad. She liked Tommy as a friend. But now with that between them, it was like what Amy said, you just can't go back to being 'just friends.'

Filed under: 2009, Journals, Kathie, Writing 1 Comment

31Aug/09Off

The Death of a Scene

The following is a scene cut from my current Work in Progress, title to be revealed later (because the agent I met with loved it tremendously and I'm just not willing to let anyone else snatch it up first). Enjoy! Feedback always appreciated. I'll upload virtual home baked cookies to all who do.

The deep idle of the Charger's engine rocked the seat beneath J.T. in a way that on any other day of the week, any other hour, he would have spent those moments dreaming about the next restoration project he'd undertake. Instead, he kept his eyes focused on the slate-gray roof of the small house just beyond the elms that obscured his full view of the building.

He had watched the rental car, a non-descript Taurus, circle the block a few times. It was all he could do to keep from bursting out with laughter. Who was that clown? Did he seriously think he was being discrete? Or was he on something and didn't notice or care? Not that it mattered. In less than an hour and hopefully much less than that, none of it would matter. History, at least that belonging to the nit-wit, was in the making. J.T.'s only regret was that Lisa wouldn't be there to see it. She would have rather enjoyed it, he thought. It might bring her the peace she seemed to need.

Rearranging himself on the vinyl covered seats that groaned like a cop's utility belt, J.T. began mentally cataloguing each second that ticked off. If Lisa couldn't be there to see it, why not give her the full play-by-play version and let her enjoy the picture he'd draw in her head. Okay, that wasn't it. Their game plan was clear; she'd fake to the right, he'd fade back. Mr. Taurus would go for the pass. Lisa was on her way south and would vanish for good. It was too risky ever connecting again. So what if he wanted to remember every detail? That didn't make him some sort of psycho, did it?

Where was Mr. Taurus anyway? It'd been a few minutes since the last pass. Had he left? Or had he parked somewhere further down the street and walked back, sneaking in through the gated yard behind the house? No, he wouldn't have snuck in, the neighbor's dog would be going ape if he had. Shoot, maybe that wasn't the guy after all. J.T. was itching to flip open his cell phone and check to see what time the call came in alerting him to Edward Cahill's, a.k.a. Mr. Taurus', arrival, but the back-light on the phone would give him away. Like the engine wouldn't. Thinking himself as a complete idiot, he started to pat down his pockets in search of the phone when he caught a glimpse of a man, whom he assumed was Cahill, walking quickly towards the house before disappearing. J.T. peered through the branches, waiting to catch one more glimpse of him just before he entered the house.

The Charger rocked a little bit harder, more than the pistons under the hood could have done with the speedometer's needle shaking under the "0" mark. A smile spread across J.T.'s face like Grandma's butter on a fresh, warm biscuit. A fireball shot up into the sky, the dark cloud of smoke, nicely contrasting with the gray roof, exploded above it. J.T. started to count to ten, got to eight and watched as another fireball, even bigger than the first, rocketed out of the house. He could even see a bright yellowish-orange light flash behind a few of the windows. And they say watching the shuttle being sent up into space is cool.

As the fire engulfed the building, crackling and popping like a homecoming bon-fire, J.T. decided to time how long it would take for the fire department to arrive. It was less than a couple of minutes when the first engine appeared followed by a squad car with sirens wailing in the distance. He backed out and cruised away. "Goodbye and farewell, Lisa," he said as he rumbled along towards westbound I-94 towards Kalamazoo.

Filed under: 2009, Critique, Discussion, Journals, Kathie, Novel Excerpt, Writing, fire No Comments

2Jun/09Off

Scrapped Research

A few months ago the Pie Dudes and I packed up and headed out to the coast for the day. It was a very long drive but well worth it as I got a lot of research done in preparation for writing a novel that I actually started during NaNoWriMo one year. While it's not necessary, I feel it's important to actually visit the places that are close to or "underneath" the fictional towns I create for the story I'm telling. In this particular instance, "Hope, California" is purely fictional, however, it's between Fort Bragg and Mendocino, along the northern California coast.

Alas, the story has taken on yet another change and the heroine, Dani, has been unceremoniously evicted from her job. The town still remains, but portions of the research are being scrapped. Curious to see how in-depth I go? Take a gander:

Hope Waterfront

"Hope, CA" waterfront near where Dani Sommers worked in the first (twenty) draft(s) of the novel, Accidental Detective.

The Corner Cafe The red building was where I pictured the location of the cafe. In the following shot, you can see between the two buildings shown left. I wanted her to have a view of the Noyo River inlet where the fishing boats come in and felt I needed to avoid the current businesses, restaurants, etc. that are actually located on the Fort Bragg side of the river.

Waterfront view

The building just past the "END" sign is across Noyo River and has a bit of a run-down restaurant that overlooks the water the kids and I like to go to when we're in the area. It was how I got the idea of where to put the cafe even if the cafe itself isn't anything like the restaurant that inspired the idea. Keep in mind, much of the actual layout was pre-planned and mapped out before we headed out for taking pictures and testing out some of the more intricate details of the book. Interestingly, not much had to be changed. One thing that went in the book, and would in real life, too, if it were up to me. It is so unattractive. Look at the ridge at the top of the picture above. See those ugly townhomes? Absolutely horrific!

United States Coast Guard Station Just to the right of the red building and the parking lot where I stood to take the pictures, there is a Coast Guard station. I took plenty of pictures because I thought it would be fun to incorporate that into the book. Alas, I went back to the original plan, using a helicopter for the big chase/apprehend scene so this didn't make it in, either. But it sure wets the whistle for future writing projects! I got a kick out of the car parked right out front. Seems a bit out of place. I fully expected to see ginormous trucks all tricked out. So much for stereotyping, eh?

Had to have a fisherman's home, too! And seeing that Dani was spending a fair amount of time around the cafe during the first chapter or so, I figured that meant I should incorporate some of the sights and sounds typical in such an area, hence the snaps of a few residences nearby the "cafe."

Serious fishermen!

Map Overlay of "Hope" The red and yellow lines are the fictitious streets (red) and bus routes (yellow) of Hope, CA which is directly overlying the actual Google map of Fort Bragg (which is mostly up above the river towards the top of the page). If the Pie Dudes don't have a hard enough time trying to keep up with Momzilla, a very proficient map reader, imagine how much "fun" they had trying to read this map!

And here, in the open field, is the future site of Hope High School. Yep, it's plenty big enough and we figured that since the field doesn't look like it's being used much, it would make the perfect location. Ironically, this was already designated as the site before we got out to see it's physical layout. Just one of those rare times when everything comes together nicely.

Hope High with portables

Looks like they've even started setting up the portables! Yes, I know, I'm being silly. I did a SketchUp of the school and even tried doing the photo layover but ... well, let's just say that's a talent that still need to be worked on and leave it at that.

Below is a picture of the actual map location of the high school (blue flag) and, as you might be able to see, the red and yellow is lain over the actual streets. The green line is an actual street, in this case a main highway - the Pacific Coast Highway or PCH.

Hope High on the map

Pacific Ocean - Mendocino

And I'll leave you with a photo of the Pacific Ocean, one of the many splendors in Dani's little town.

Filed under: 2009, Journals, Kathie, Photo Essay, travel 2 Comments

16Apr/09Off

Commingling Real Life with Fiction

As a fiction novelist, I prefer to create fictional places yet situate them near real places. For example, the town in Accidental Detectives: Missing Person's Bureau was carved out between Fort Bragg and Mendocino with occasional references to the two actual towns.

Real

fictional

While today's technology lets us virtually visit nearly every place in the

Filed under: 2009, Article, Discussion, Journals, Kathie, Rants, Thoughts, Writing, travel Continue reading

9Mar/09Off

Which Comes First: Publish Short Stories? Go After Book Deal?

Publishing houses are rethinking their strategies (and if they're not, they should be). Agents are tightening up, becoming more discriminating about who they sign on to represent. If you're a newcomer to the publishing game, you might want to really think carefully about what you're headed into. At least that seems to be the thought echoing through many of the literary blogs and papers these days.

Conventions and conferences are seeing a decline in participants. Agents have said no. Editors are reconsidering attendance. Publishers are rethinking whether it's a wise marketing move or if their money is better spent elsewhere during these trying times. Writers are also reluctant to spend their money networking at these functions because, well, in the grand scheme of things, it's a luxury.

But a real writer can't just throw in the towel and stop. It's part of living, it's the reason for getting up in the morning. Not to write would be like -- well, like telling someone to make their heart stop beating. You. Can't. Do. That.

And then there comes that question that seems to surface during moments like these when our economy is lackluster (or downright dismal) - can I really "wow" them enough with what I have so far? This question can surface at anytime whether that's before you even sit down to write your synopsis or well after you've received your twenty-first rejection letter.

Some authors and others in the industry will tell you to hone your talents and perfect that one spectacular manuscript and go all out. Some even venture as far as suggesting you hire the necessary folks (editors, marketing representatives, specialists, beta readers, etc.) to ensure that you truly have a marketable piece because, after all, that's the bottom line: will it sell?

Others will advise a bit of a different approach. Publish short stories in various magazines and newsletters - start without pay, work your way into a paying base. The name of the game is making a name for yourself. Enter writing contests, hit up places like Duotrope.com and the back section of your favorite writing 'zine, take a jaunt to the library or local bookstore and sift through the various Writer's Market books for ideas on places where you can submit your haiku, prose, essays and shorts (stories, that is, I doubt anyone will be inclined to receive your *ahem* shorts, except maybe if it's a tangible erotica bit...). Can you whittle down a chapter of your manuscript into a short story that might help seal the deal in getting the bigger work published?

I've begun rethinking my strategy but I can tell you for certain, despite Rachelle Gardner's suggestion that I as a WAHM (work at home mom) should relax and not actively pursue a career as a published author until after the kids have flown the coop (sorry, I do not subscribe to this one bit but that's a rant for another time, although for the record, I do think very highly of Rebecca), I'm still moving forward. Just a few steps to the right and a couple back so that when I do progress in that forward motion, it will be with the speed and ferocity of a superhero!

What are your thoughts? What approach have you taken? If you're a published author, what do you recommend to those aspiring to become an author? If you are aspiring to be an author, what route are you likely to take? Leave your comment and let's discuss!